Cascada's Dance Floor Negligence

Today on Pop Exegete, I’m going to get a little serious. It’s an issue that I've been trying to raise awareness about for almost five years now. After a firmly worded letter from Center for Disease Control threatening a restraining order if I don’t stop calling, I've decided to take this conversation to a much more reasonable arena: the internet. For this post, we’re going to take a serious look at Cascada’s 2009 hit “Evacuate the Dance Floor,” especially as it relates to current trends in American public health policy.

"Evacuate The Dancefloor"

(Oh)
Turn up the music
Let´s get out on the floor
I like to move it
Come and give me some more

Watch me getting physical
Out of control, Ah
There’s people watching me, Ah
I never miss a beat

Still the night, kill the lights
Feel it under your skin
Time is right, keep it tight
‘Cause it’s pulling you in

Wrap it up you can’t stop
‘Cause it feels like an overdose
(feels like an overdose)

Oh, oh
Evacuate the dancefloor
Oh, oh
I’m infected by the sound
Oh, oh
Stop this beat is killing me
Hey Dr. DJ let the music take me underground

(Everybody in the club)
Oh, oh
Evacuate the dancefloor
Oh, oh
I’m infected by the sound
(Everybody in the club)
Oh, oh
Stop this beat is killing me
Hey Dr. DJ come burn this place right down to the ground

(Oh)
My body’s aching
System overload
Temperature’s rising
I’m about to explode

Watch me I’m intoxicated
Taking the show, Ah
It`s got me hypnotized, Ah
Everybody step aside

Still the night, kill the lights
Feel it under your skin
Time is right, keep it tight
‘Cause it’s pulling you in

Wrap it up you can’t stop
‘Cause it feels like an overdose
(feels like an overdose)

(chorus)

Come on and evacuate
Feel the club is heating up
Move on and accelerate
Push it to the top
Come on and evacuate
Feel the club is heating up
Move on and accelerate
You don’t have to be afraid

Now guess who’s back with a brand new track?
They got everybody in the club going mad
So everybody in the back
Get your back up off the wall and just shake that thang

Go crazy
Yo lady
Yo baby
Let me see you wreck that thang
Now drop it down low, low
Let me see you take it to the dancefloor, yo

(chorus, ad nauseum)

I had to cut out some of the lyrics because almost 50% of the song is:

Everybody in the club
(Stop this beat is killing me)
Hey Dr. DJ let the music take me underground

So, if you feel like something is missing, just add that in, and you’ll be caught up with everyone else.

Before I get into a detailed look at the lyrics, I want to raise one important area where Cascada has been grossly careless and where clubs have been simply negligent. What if this song were to play during an actual dance floor emergency? Would the calm announcement to please evacuate the dance floor be taken seriously? Would they just think that the DJ was creating some clever introduction to this song?

Lives are at stake Cascada.

Shame on you.

In addition to their laissez-faire approach to club safety; the advice given in this song is, at best, confused. This confusion can only lead to damaging effects on the American public’s approach to safety in a multitude of situations.

The main culprit is the song’s hook:

Oh, oh
Evacuate the dancefloor
Oh, oh
I’m infected by the sound
Oh, oh
Stop this beat is killing me
Hey Dr. DJ let the music take me underground

Let’s get one thing straight Cascada (and the CDC should recognize this as a real threat), dance floor evacuations are REAL and they HAPPEN. However, the singer clearly state that she is “infected by the sound,” and that your “temperature’s rising.”  That sounds pretty serious.

What do you not want to do with an infection? Spread it absolutely everywhere. What would an evacuation do? It would take the infection away from the dance floor, spreading it into the club and out onto the street only making the infection worse. Realistically, the song should be:

Oh, oh
Quarantine the dancefloor
Oh, oh
I’m infected by the sound
Oh, oh
Stop this beat is killing me
Hey Mr. DJ, I’m willing to sacrifice my personal good for the safety of the general public

Which I’m willing to admit is not as catchy.

Of course, in the only piece of advice in this song that makes any sense at all, the DJ is told to “burn this place right down to the ground,” but at this point what would that accomplish? The infection has made it out into the streets. The seal has been broken. Destroying infection point zero isn’t going to help at this point.

Also, why is burning the place down to the ground the DJ’s job? Isn’t there some sort of club owner that would be held responsible for that? Is the DJ doing it so the owner can collect on the insurance payments and not be accused of committing insurance fraud? Is DJ to dance floor as captain is to sinking ship? Is Mr. DJ expected to go down with the flaming dance floor while everyone else escapes? After all, it is his fault.

Did you notice that? The song exclaims “Stop this beat is killing me,” who is responsible the beat? The DJ. Is “let the music take me underground” a cry for help from those suffering on the dance floor, asking the DJ to just end the suffering of all infected by the sound?

By the time you reach Pitbull’s verse on this song, in your heart of hearts, you’ll hear the whispered answer:

Yes.